This Friday and Saturday I'll be attending the Penn State coaches clinic. The trip will be highlighted by an address from Joe Paterno on Friday evening and then a chance to watch Penn State's intrasquad scrimmage on Saturday afternoon.
If I get close enough to Coach Paterno to shake his hand, I won't. It would end up like one of those Halloween jokes where his hand comes off and I stand there petrified. And he'd be like, "Oh, I hate it when that happens," but he wouldn't be kidding. And then he'd beat me senseless.
I'm afraid of 82-year-old men. Don't judge me.